I miss my baby!

I am only 18 years old.... I was not expecting to have a baby at this age. But when I started bleeding real heavy and having bad pains I knew that I was pregnant. Even though I never once held my baby, I still miss it. I wish that I was able to go through full term with the baby and have to baby grow up normal in life.... I been crying ever since last night wehn I was in the hospital bed. I felt the baby come out of me. I knew it wasnt no clot. The doctors tried telling me that thats what it was but it didnt feel like a clot to me at all. I was so hurt by the fact I lost my first baby. I didn't tell anyone but my mother and the babys dad that I had lost the baby. My dad doesn't even know that i was pregnant.. I dont have enough heart to tell him... i talked to my babys dad and told him about the SHARE burial and he said that i should do it... He wont be around when the burial is he'll be out to sea b/c hes in the navy but he will come back to vist when he gets home... We are still together and I thank god everyday that he stuck by my side when all of this was happening. My own mother didnt even go to the hospital with me.. My boyfriend stayed there with me all night even after the surgery. I love him so much.... I been crying all day just thinking about it. I really have no idea how i am gonna get over this